Snowpacalypse

I took a few pictures of the recent snow storm that swept through this state, and just thought I'd share them. These are just a few quick shots from outside my front door. I thankfully didn't have to drive out on the ice, it just so happened that I had the week off of work. (Well I was scheduled to work on Saturday, but I had food poisoning all day Friday and am still recovering from that. I haven't had my stomach hurt that bad for that long in a very, very long time, if ever!? It was not worth missing work, that's for sure!) Anyway, back to the weather ...

My power went off Thursday morning just after I laid Riley down for his nap. I called my mom to check if she had power, but she also was without. She had said that my brother was offering to drive her to lunch, and I asked to join in on that deal. Long story short we ended up going to Red Robin for lunch. It was a nice meal, with good conversation (though my mom accidentally spilled her diet coke all over the table and onto my jeans) . :) As we were wrapping up, the lights went out. Pretty much everyone groaned or said "oh man!" It was kind of funny. We didn't care, because we had finished up, but got Red Robin Bucks out of it. In all the commotion I forgot to ask for a balloon for Riley. I promised him one too. Later, I know he won't let me forget that easily. ;)

Well, to bed I go. It is so comforting to hear baby snores coming from the video monitor. He is such a noisy sleeper! :)

Riley and the Red Balloon

This morning Riley came running up to me with a red Red Robin balloon. He had the goofiest grin on his face, he was so very proud of himself. I worked for 12 hours yesterday and my mom watched him. My youngest two nephews got out of school early, so the 4 of them went out to lunch. My little man got a balloon out of the deal. :) He didn't get a chance to show me it until this morning, and by the look on his face he was very happy to share his joy with me. :) He spent the majority of this morning playing with his balloon, until finally the string came untied and the balloon deflated. He just sort of sat there expressionless. He didn't cry or fuss. And that is the story of Riley and the red balloon.  :)

Baby Fever

Since Riley turned a year old, I have been thinking about having baby #2. I truly think I'm ready for another little bundle, but there are so many reasons why we shouldn't right now. I held Jamaal's cousin's 5 month old (who was premature so she is developmentally just a touch behind schedule, yet weighs almost as much as Riley does. :D) She fell asleep in my arms, and was just so precious to hold.

There are so many things about pregnancy that I just don't miss. Mostly, being a gestational diabetic. That just wasn't fun. However, I do think that since I've done it once before, I could handle it a bit easier this time.

There wouldn't be an issue if it weren't for maternity leave. I don't want to have to go back to work right away. And I don't have very much leave time saved up yet. So that would mean I wouldn't get to stay home as long as I did with Riley (16 weeks). At least I wouldn't get paid as much as I did, and way back then it was a huge difference in pay. Since I am working less now, we are less able to save up some funds to help cover me being on maternity leave. We need my paycheck right now.

My solution is simple:

If Jamaal gets a better job, which he has been applying for one and will hopefully hear back after the new year, we might be able to handle me going on leave. He would make more, with the opportunity for overtime, so we would likely be able to save something.

I've applied at a couple other places as well. But that doesn't really go with the whole plan. As it would be even more difficult to go on maternity leave after starting a brand new job. Mostly, I am just interested in working someplace closer to my home. That would make childcare a touch easier, and would decrease my transit time a little.

I'm hopeful that Jamaal would also be able to take some parental leave, so that we could have some time together as a family. He was only able to take off 5 days after Riley was born, and two of those days were the weekend. (We had Riley on a Thursday and by Tuesday he was back to work.) While it was rough then, I'm sure it would be even more difficult trying to manage a newborn and a toddler at the same time.

Here's to the new year! And someday, the New Neagle...

Thyroid drama, continued.

For previous posts on my thyroid drama, go here.


Every year I have an ultrasound to check in on my thyroid. After having Riley, I sort of forgot to check in as I was supposed to. It just wasn't on my priority list. So I was a little late checking in this year. (I usually go to see her in April). 


So, in September I went in for what I thought was a routine ultrasound. But as the tech finishes up, she says, "I'm going to show the Radiologist, and he will decide if you need a biopsy." At first I thought, "how neat, I'll find out my results right away." But I quickly realized what she meant. If he decided I needed a biopsy, he would perform it that day. Deeply rooted anxiety washed over me. 


I just wasn't prepared for a biopsy. No. I can't. Looking back on it now, I am a little bit annoyed/irritated/bothered by what happened next: she looked disappointed. 


As I analyze the situation now, I realize she had an intern following her that day. "Perfect, another checkbox to fill in, you might get to assist on a biopsy today." I imagine she might have said. When I refused, I deflated her a little. 


She was looking forward to it. 


While she was out of the room, I thought about the situation. Was I being dramatic? Should I just get it over with? I had driven myself while my Mom watched Riley. She could come get me, and I could pick up my car later. My heart was thumping in my chest. And I felt guilty that the intern wouldn't get to assist on my biopsy that day. I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts to realize the inappropriate way the ultrasound tech had responded. I was close to changing my mind...


Sure enough, my thyroid had changed a little, and the Radiologist recommended a biopsy. But I just could not get over the panic I felt. 


I probably should have just done it then to get it over with, because it took me until the end of November to finally reschedule the biopsy, but I didn't. By the time my appointment came around, I was just as nervous, if not more since I had a lot of time to work myself up over it. 


The whole procedure was done in less than 30 minutes, and I've been through it before so I knew this going in. But it did hurt this time, as it did the first time, and I was extremely stressed throughout the procedure. The ultrasound tech (a male this time) was caring. He really did try to help me relax. I told him my history, that I had a very bad experience the first time, (a better experience the second time, though I was having trouble remembering the details) and I recounted how the Attending (during my first biopsy) had said "you see that? That is the carotid artery, don't hit that." All, while a needle was in my neck. 


He reassured me that even if the needle went through my carotid artery, a small amount of pressure would be enough to stop the bleeding. The needle is so small that it wouldn't do very much damage. This helped me relax ever so slightly. 


After the procedure, and the Radiologist left, the tech put pressure on my neck. Within a few minutes I began to feel light-headed. I told him so. My hands began tingling, and I started seeing a light flashing over my head. I envisioned myself on a gurney being pushed down a hallway with the overhead lights flashing past...


Then he touched my arm, and brought me back. He said he was starting to lose me, that I had started to twitch as if beginning to fall asleep. It was the weirdest feeling I've ever had. Then, I had waves of nausea, that I fought desperately. He brought me a bottle of water which helped. I did not want to throw up. I was embarrassed enough having passed out. Yet again, an experience I did not want to repeat. 


As was the case with my first biopsy, I developed a rash over my neck following the ultrasound. I'm pretty sure now that I am allergic to chlorahexadine scrub, as that is what the two have in common. I requested iodine during my second biopsy, because my Doctor had determined that I might be allergic to the chlorahexadine. I decided this time to verify this to be true...


I didn't receive my results until yesterday. They came back "inconclusive." My endocrinologist's nurse was the one to call, and she told me Dr. Q recommended a repeat biopsy in SIX WEEKS. I immediately said no way. All of my results have been "inconclusive" according to her. I am still a little annoyed over it. I'm wondering if I should find a new endocrinologist to get a second opinion. But she is pretty well recommended. I sort of agreed to repeating it in 6 months instead. But I'm not sold on that either. I have until June to figure it out I guess...

Riley's life in review.

Day 1- After 8.5 months of waiting, he was finally in my arms. He made lots of noise when breathing, and kept the nurses on edge, but he was just a noise maker, there wasn't a problem. At 12 days old, he went to his very first movie: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1

Month 1- This is an outfit his Uncle Lamar got him from Sweden. This was a rough time for mama, because he never slept at night.

Month 2- This picture was taken during a trip to visit with other babies from ladies I went to high school with. Some of you might recognize a certain baby girl's fist in this photo. :D He began smiling during this month.

 

Month 3- His very fist St. Patty's day. His daddy is part Irish, so this Holiday is kind of big on that side of the family. :D He started sleeping long periods of time (4 hours or longer) during this month. Mommy and daddy went out on their first "date" to the movie Paul.

 Month 4- He laughed for the first time during this month. Mommy had to go back to work.

Month 5- Daddy was playing video games, and Riley fell asleep. :D He went to his first Sounder's game this month against Portland (it was a tie). He really started grabbing things, and became interested in his feet. We went to ocean shores on vacation as a family, with a friend (and his girlfriend). Uncle Lamar scored his first MLS goal! :D

Month 6- He began solids this month. He ate homemade rice cereal in this photo. Most of it ended up on his face or clothes at first, but he really enjoyed eating. He started sitting up on his own this month. 

Month 7- Here he is eating prunes mixed with rice cereal. He loves eating. He started saying "ba ba ba" and "da da da." Mommy and daddy went camping, and left him behind. He stayed with both grandmas, each for a night. He actually slept better for them. At the end of this month, he started going from stomach to sitting, and started rocking on hands and knees. Near the 8th month he started crawling officially.

Month 8- He continues to love food. Most of the pictures I have from this month include him eating. :D Here, he has a rice puff stuck on his nose. :D He slept in his own room starting this month. He would flip right to his stomach, and make mama nervous, but he still will only sleep on his stomach.

Month 9- Here he is enjoying chicken noodles. During this month he had his first taste of dog food, and liked it. Blech. He has never swallowed any dog food, but we often have to sweep it out of his mouth. That kid is fast! He started eating oatmeal, banana and lightly toasted toast. He started pulling himself up and standing while holding on to things this month. And started walking around items as well, while holding on of course.

 Month 10- Here he is enjoying some Cheerios. But it looks like he is giggling, or telling a secret. :D He often "lounges" while eating, sticking his feet up on his tray, like he is doing here.  He eats a lot of different things, and is really good at feeding himself finger foods. He had his first big "owie" on Halloween. He cut his lip open on the corner of a coffee table. BTW, he dressed up as a bear. We had a bear outfit already, and mommy colored his nose with some stamp ink. Easy. He got really good at walking while holding on to things this month. We thought for sure he would walk.



Month 11- He took 3 steps before sitting down and crawling. By the end of the month, he was walking about half time. He eats pretty much anything you give him. His first Thanksgiving was filled with stuffing, turkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potato, and green beans. He loved it.



One year- He started walking most of the time a couple days ago. Now, it is clear, that he would rather walk. He is able to stand up from the middle of the room. He is able to pause to pick something up, and continue on. He loves playing with cars, and "vrooming." He loves gold fish crackers (and really any type of cracker you give him). I would say that bananas are his favorite food though. If they didn't constipate him, I would give them to him daily. :D He is still wearing 6 months and 6-9 months clothing. 9 months clothes are a bit big still. He started drinking from a straw a few weeks ago (okay so technically in Month 11), and now will go crazy for water from a straw. A couple nights ago one of Riley's toys said "bye bye" and he mimicked it. He repeated this two more times, but doesn't do it much anymore. Today he kept repeating "Hi" while we were out shopping.

Happy Birthday to my baby boy! Mommy and Daddy love you much. 

Losing the weight

I started writing this post earlier this week.

11/30/2011

Wednesday. Weigh in day. Today caused me much anxiety, mostly due to the fact that Thanksgiving was last week, and I had 4 slices of pie during that time. Plus several servings of my mom's fabulous stuffing. (But not all on the same day. It was so scrumptious as leftovers!) I was always conscious of the serving sizes on my plate. I bought a scale at one of the meetings a couple weeks back, and I use that A LOT when I'm making up my plate. I always thought my biggest problem was snacking. When I was home with Riley I found myself in the pantry a lot, pulling out bags of chips to snack out of, or making super buttery popcorn, and eat it ALL. But now I realize my biggest problem was portion control. I still snack a lot. But I measure out my snacks first. I make sure I don't overindulge, unless it really seems worth it to me.

Like homemade pecan pie. That, my friends, is worth it to me. ;)

Anyway...I was pretty nervous standing on that scale waiting for my results when the receptionist said "You lost 0.8 pounds. Good job!"

I didn't share, but last week I hit my first 10 pound mark. (The week before I lost 5% of my body weight.)

And today, 12/4/2011 I fit back into my pre-pregnancy jeans. Just shy of one year after he was born, and I can say I fit in my old jeans again. Comfortably.

I have to say, I am very proud of myself. It feels amazing to be able to look in the mirror and be happier with what I see. I was feeling pretty crummy about myself before I started losing weight. I am still on the losing side of this journey though, I have about 8 pounds left to lose until my goal weight, but it feels doable now. I still have a little "muffin top," but I had that before I got pregnant. So, it would be nice to lose it.

I keep thinking about those lucky few ladies who have babies and are in their pre-pregnancy jeans within 6 weeks. I was hoping and praying that I would be one of those women who could blink and lose 15 pounds (and well I did that for the first 20 pounds, but I had more weight to lose than 20 pounds.) But it became abundantly clear to me that I was not in that category. I'm okay with that now. Because I have lost 12+ pounds and I am almost there. I can feel it. I feel my confidence building. I feel sexier. But most of all, I feel like I could do it all over again.

And hopefully I will. Only next time I vow to only gain 20 pounds, not 40 as I did the first time. Even though I had read about pregnancy and what to eat, and what not to eat, and how you only need 400 calories more to help support a pregnancy. I still felt entitled to treats, extra helpings, and extravagant desserts, because I was carrying something precious. I have a feeling that that is why I was diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes. Because I was so overly careless with my diet during the first and second trimester. I did not feel like I was being careless at the time. But looking back, I relied too much on my cravings, and not so much on my dietary requirements.

I craved Coke Icees from Burger King, and some weeks I would have one nearly every day. That meant getting off an exit before mine, just to get one. (During the summer months they are only $1, so it is a steal of a deal.) I would go through the drive thru just for one. Carbs were what I wanted.

I think that this is the reason why I had such a difficult time with the diagnosis and changing my diet. Carbohydrates had become the majority of my caloric intake. I didn't know anything else. Now I feel like I have a better grasp on what I need versus what I want. That is not to say that I won't treat myself to a slice of cheesecake or some french fries, but I will do so in moderation.

This is still true now, even while I am only nourishing myself (I suppose I am also nourishing Riley, as he is still nursing some.) I am taking what I learned while pregnant, and what I have learned so far while on Weight Watchers, and applying it to my life. Because while I wish I could eat whatever I want when I want it, realistically I know that my health is more important.

Family Shoot

A friend of ours agreed to take some family pictures of us, she was so flexible, and rescheduled for Sunday (we originally had planned on Wednesday, but it was drizzling/pouring rain all day, and I wanted some outdoor shots). It was FREEZING out. But Riley was a trooper. He never cried or fussed. But, he rarely smiled as well. These are just a few of the shots Stacy has passed along as a teaser. I can't wait to see the rest. :D Go here to see some of her other work, and contact her to schedule your session. 

I cannot believe my little man is almost a YEAR. It feels like it should be June.

In other news: I continue to lose, and have lost a total of 8.8 pounds. I'm hoping to continue to lose over the next two weeks, but with Thanksgiving, I would be happy to maintain as well. :D