Graham Edwin: The Birth Story

If you remember, I was very frustrated with how this pregnancy was going. I had agreed to an induction, but was getting denied the opportunity to go into the hospital. They kept telling me to call in, and every time they would say, call back in a couple hours. It was mentally draining. I was struggling with the concept. I shed many, many tears. My sleep was interrupted on Wednesday, as they told me to call in at 6 am, 9 am, and 11 am. Finally, at 11 am they gave me a check in time of 1 pm. If they didn't call me before then.

Finally relief! I showered, packed up our stuff, and we were on our way.

The issue: the hospital went "live" with electronic charting and orders on the Saturday before, so everything in the hospital was slower than normal. (And, I assume, the staffing ratios were even more important to keep low, since the nurses had a lot of new stuff to watch out for.)

We were checked into our room, and an hour later I received the first dose of cytotec, a pill. Cytotec is used to start labor by softening the cervix. After talking with the nurse about my first labor and delivery, she told me that Riley's birth was also an induction. I never considered that, since my water spontaneously broke. However, since contractions needed help to really get started, with cytotec, it was considered an induction.

I was given my first dose at 2:45pm. It is given every 3 hours. I had to be monitored for 1 hour after taking it, but then was allowed to walk and leave the floor. It was nice to be able to walk around and feel like a normal person. Unfortunately, the cytotec didn't do much as far as changing my cervix. I was at 1-2cm when I arrived at the hospital, and after 2 doses, I was at a 2. My contractions were irregular, and mostly mild. At 11 pm the new night nurse came in to meet me. She said that the midwife was on her way in, and we would find out if I would be staying in the hospital or going home.

I was not too excited to hear this. She said sometimes cytotec doesn't work, and mothers can go home for a couple days until labor starts. I was ready to put up a fight. Sure, my contractions weren't regular. But I wasn't always comfortable. How would I know to come back in?

So, I was left to labor for a while as we waited for the midwife to come. It was 1245 before I saw my nurse again. I still hadn't seen a midwife, but my contractions were still there. Irregular, but there. My nurse tells me that the midwife says I get to stay. And she is going to start me on pitocin. So she had to start an IV.

The first attempt was painful, and unfortunately she wasn't successful. I was praying that her second attempt would be a success, because I didn't want to go all "nurse" on her. The cannulas they use feel like they are as big as a drinking straw, I swear! The second IV was just as painful, but it was a success. So, she started up the pitocin. I was a bit nervous. Pitocin makes the contractions more regular, but they are unnatural. Now, I was supposed to stay on the monitor, which meant I was supposed to stay in bed. The contractions really started picking up. For me at least. They were quite painful. All I wanted to do was get up and move. My nurse, when she was in there, was very helpful in telling me to let the contractions be. My gut reaction was to tighten and fight the contractions. I felt like I had to go to the bathroom every 30 minutes or so, so I would walk the short distance to the bathroom.

I had the typical bowel movement, and I began realizing I was starting labor. But I was trying to be quiet about it. I felt like the monitor was showing mild contractions, and if I was whining about them I was just being a baby. So I tried to be as quiet and stoic about them as possible.

But eventually I wore down. I was snappy at my mom at times, which was a completely different experience from when I was laboring with Riley. With Riley I pretty much asked for the epidural once contractions started, so the rest of my labor I was comfortable and a little medicated.

My mother-in-law had a flight to catch. She had delayed it when we though I was going in on Tuesday, thinking she would get to meet the baby, then leave the following day. But now it was looking as if she wouldn't get to meet him after all. She had a car coming to pick her up at our house at 5:30am. Just before 4:00am, she decides she needs to leave. So she and Jamaal leave to go get her car. It was while they were gone that I asked my nurse: "What do I need to be to get an epidural?" She said at least 4cm dilated. She went to get the midwife, to see if she wanted to be the one to check me. So, I went to the bathroom. Sitting on the toilet I chanted: Please be a 4! Please be a 4! I was ready to relax.

The nurse came back 10 minutes later (which felt like an eternity) saying that the midwife was in a delivery, so she would be the one to check me. I was at a 5 or a 6, and my bag of water was bulging. Whew! "Epidural it up!" I said. But first she had to run a bolus of fluid in. And she increased the rate of the IV fluids. Time seemed to stop. It was 4:00am at this point. Jamaal got back in the room around 4:20. They sent my mom out of the room saying that only one family member could be there while the epidural was being placed.

At around 4:30 or so people started coming in to get the room ready. And they set me up on the side of the bed. The anesthesiologist came in the room and immediately went on the computer. He started asking me questions, but at this point my contractions were bad enough that I really could not talk through them. And they seemed to be on top of each other, so I was having a rough time answering. I was very irritated with the guy, but didn't want to be mean to him because he had the drugs.

Finally they got me positioned, and he started prepping me. At 4:45am a lot of things happened. He had the epidural needle in my back and I said "Uh oh." Everyone in the room stopped. For a second it was silent. They asked me what was wrong and my water broke. The reason I said "uh oh" was I had an overwhelming desire to push. So much so that I really could not fight it. My eyes were huge as I looked to my nurse who was helping me to stay in position. She calmed me down, told me to make small grunts if I had to push, but that was impossible. It was like putting a starving person in front of a buffet and telling them to not eat. I was panicked. My worst fear realized: having no pain relief for the delivery. The anesthesiologist started to speed things up. He got the catheter in, and gave me a bolus of numbing medicine and some fentanyl. I felt some relief. But I still felt like pushing. It was then that my nurse told me that once he was done, we would swing my legs over onto the bed, and start pushing. You're going to have a baby, they kept saying but I was still worried. How the heck was I going to make it through this!?

Meanwhile, my mom was out in the waiting area. When my water broke, there was quite a commotion. I believe that is when the midwife got in the room, and people started breaking the bed down. She heard the noise and got back to my room as quick as she could. Someone at the door stopped her from coming in. Asked her who she was, (she responded with "Mom") And they asked Jamaal if "mom" could come in, and he said yes. I was too busy trying (unsuccessfully) to keep from pushing.

And my nurse was right. The nurses helped me swing my legs back on the bed, and the midwife checked be and confirmed that I was ready to push. I want to say I pushed for a total of 5 contractions. In between one of them I said "Riley is my favorite." :) I was joking of course, but this delivery for sure hurt worse than Riley's. The midwife was very helpful, and my nurse was right there talking me through it. At 5:13am Graham Edwin Neagle was born. He cried immediately. And apparently had his hand at his face, so the midwife is certain he would have been out sooner if he had his arms at his sides.

I didn't tear or need stitches, which was a relief. The midwife and I introduce ourselves to each other. She had come in the room to meet me, little did she know she would be delivering my baby first. :) He was, and is, perfect.

Graham Edwin Neagle

Born 8/8/2013 at 5:13am

7 lbs 10 oz

18.25" long

Our New Arrival

Riley Oliver Neagle

December 16th at 12:59pm

6lbs 8 ounces

18-3/4" long

Birth story:

December 15th at 1900, I was just finishing dinner, sitting on the couch, when I felt a little teensie gush. I thought for a minute, and went to the bathroom. I've heard of people peeing their pants later on in pregnancy. I went to the bathroom, and as I was washing my hands, I felt more fluid leaking out. I yelled to Jamaal: "I think my water just broke." He was a little flustered and didn't really believe me at first. I was a bit flustered as well, and couldn't remember what we were supposed to do. Jamaal told me to call, so I did.

The midwife called back rather quickly. She took some history, looked up my Group B Strep results (I was negative) and told me I could go in whenever I wanted. My mom's first labor started very similarly: her water broke first, then she had some contractions, and in 3 hours she gave birth to my brother. I was nervous that that might happen to me, and I didn't want my son to be born in a moving vehicle. So, after showering and finishing up packing a few things, we left for the hospital. My mom and his mom and brother met us there.

At 2145, I was checked for the very first time and was 2-3cm and 50% effaced. My contractions were just starting, and were maybe as bad as menstrual cramping. They barely hurt. They put me on and off the monitors to check his heart rate and my contractions, in between being on the monitor I would get up and walk around my room. And bounced on a birthing ball. Meanwhile getting grossed out at how much fluid was leaking out of me. Eventually one of the nurses gave me one of the ginormous pads for after the birth, which helped me to not have to change my pad every hour or two. (The ginormous pads might as well be called Attends. I swear, I didn't know they made pads that big.)

My contractions didn't really go anywhere, so the midwife ordered me to take Cytotek (a pill) to help my cervix to dilate and my contractions to start. They gave me a half of a dose, as I was hoping to go pretty naturally. Shortly after I took that, I got tired (it was 3 am at this point), and went to sleep. Elf was just starting when I went to sleep and it just ending when I woke up, so I slept for about 2 hours.

Unfortunately, I was in a "triage room" and only had one bed in the room. That left Jamaal, and our Moms (his brother left just after midnight) without sleep. Jamaal slumped forward in a chair and got a little bit of sleep, but it was not very good rest. After 0700 our day nurse brought in a mat for him, which he only got to use for about 1-2 hours. I don't know why the night nurse didn't bring one in for us....I'm hoping it is because there weren't any available.

At 0700, our moms left to the cafeteria to eat and relax. It was right after they left, that I noticed my contractions were getting a lot worse. I was having a hard time relaxing, I found myself writhing in the bed, trying to get comfortable. By 0915, I had decided to get an epidural. I realized that I was panicking: if it hurts this bad now, how will it be in an hour? How will it be during the birth? I hadn't really complained at all about my contractions: they could tell in my face when I was having one, but I wasn't making much noise with them. After I went to the bathroom, and realized how uncomfortable I was, I went to my bed, and called my nurse. I told her I wanted to be checked to see if it was too late for an epidural. She asked if there was a certain point that if I made it that far, I would just keep going (that way she could encourage me one way or another). I wanted the epidural no matter what. I was 6cm dilated at that point.

The anesthesiologist was in the room within 5 minutes. It was at this point that my day nurse went on break to pump, and an older nurse came in to cover for her. It seems that she doesn't do patient care as much as she used to, or she is just kind of a flighty lady. Or perhaps both. The RN offered to put in my IV, but he wanted to get stuff moving along. (And I think he knew that if he let her start the IV, he would be waiting around for much longer than if he started it himself.) He had kind of a "time is money" attitude, whereas she had a much more relaxed way of thinking. She was making his job much harder than it had to be. Because of the contractions, I didn't really feel the IV get put in. He did a good job. Even though he seemed a bit rushed, he was really a nice guy, and I could tell that he was good at what he did. He sort of looked like House, but didn't have the attitude.

Once the IV was in, he had me dangle over the edge of the bed. I was really nervous about this part, which took way longer than I thought it would. Even though I know I was having contractions, I was so focused on what was going on behind me, that I didn't really care about them. It was very uncomfortable getting the epidural, at one point it felt like he was plucking strings on my back that were somehow connected to my spinal cord.

Once the epidural was in, things seemed to move really quickly. I got a new nurse (my third), since I was now laboring and needed a labor nurse. They didn't have a labor room available, so I stayed in the triage room to deliver. The only thing they needed to get to make it ready for delivery was a baby warmer. (Once they found an unused warmer and brought it to my room, another nurse tried to come and take it thinking a triage patient would not need to have a warmer. When she asked if she could take it about 5 people yelled "No! We need that!")

They left me on the monitors since I couldn't get up anyway, and his heart rate kept going down with contractions. At first the nurse just said it was normal decelerations associated with his head getting compressed with the contractions. But after a while his heart rate would decelerate (go down) and take a while to come back up, which concerned my nurses. They tried changing my position, (something I remember my maternity instructor calling "rotisserie labor,") but this only worked for a little bit. After the first big position change, I met my 4th and 5th nurse. This was at 1100. (The reason I got two nurses is that one of them was relatively new to nursing and worked at Enumclaw hospital (which only has like 4 beds total for labor and delivery) so she was at St. Joe's to get more experience with labor and delivery. At Enumclaw she might have one delivery during a shift, maybe. At St. Joe's they have several deliveries every day. She was nice. But because I was worried about things, I wasn't up to chit chat much, and she was trying to get me to talk. I was very worried that I was going to have to have a cesarean, and even more worried that there was something wrong with my baby.

Eventually the new nurse decided to try holding the heartbeat monitor a little tighter, and see if that helped keep his heart rate up, and it did! So all that worrying really was just the monitor not picking up his heart beat. Really once the epidural was started things seemed to really pick up. I don't remember it being very long before I was pushing, but I do know that it was over 3 hours before he was born after the epidural was started.

Just after noon, it was time to start pushing. My epidural had worn off just enough that I had good use of my legs, but couldn't feel much in my abdomen or pelvis. They kept telling me that I was a really good pusher, but it was really hard for me to tell if I was pushing or not. I ended up pushing for 40 minutes. I was getting cheered on, but near the end I kept thinking to myself that they were lying to me. They got out a mirror to give me some inspiration, but it really didn't help me much. It just made me more of a non-believer, because it didn't look like he was moving very much to me. ;) It was a lot easier for me to have my eyes closed during the pushing, though so I didn't really look in the mirror very much.

We (my mom, MIL and nurses) had talked about how it felt to finally get the head and body out, and really there is no relief quite like it. Emotions aside, it really was quite a relief to get to that point. I am SO thankful for a successful vaginal delivery. :D

I found out after he was born, that he was in a very difficult position to push out. Had he been much bigger, or had I not opted for the epidural, I probably would have had a cesarean.

Riley was placed on my chest right after delivery, and we stared at each other for quite some time before he was taken to be weighed and measured. We did not nurse right away, which goes against everything I read about (and was told) prior to delivery. Since I had gestational diabetes, he was at high risk of having a low blood sugar, and early and frequent nursing helps to prevent this. I was too nervous to try to do it myself, and no one helped to get him to latch on. I'm not too upset by this, and didn't really think about it much at the time, only now, as I'm writing this did I think much about it. He barely cried, and did a lot of grunting. He is still about the same, he makes a lot of noise, but doesn't cry too much.

Food never tasted so good as that first meal after delivery. I had a grilled cheese and fries, fruit and strawberry ice cream. Mostly carbs of course. I didn't eat it all, but it was scrumptious.

Everything else went pretty smoothly. His blood sugars and temperatures were normal. He passed his hearing screening (after having to recheck his right ear). And he successfully peed and pooped within 24 hours of being born.

Nursing has been natural for us. It is exhausting, which is my only complaint. I have had moments of despair when I think how much easier it would be to formula feed, and how much more sleep I might have if I could pass off a feeding or two to someone else. These thoughts are even stronger those nights that he wants to feed every hour and a half. Sometimes he feeds for as long as 45 minutes and still might want to feed again in 45 minutes. I am able to fall asleep rather quickly, but 45 minutes of sleep isn't enough for me to feel rested. My midwife told me that I need to get 8 hours of sleep, especially when it is in short bursts like it has been. I was fine for the first couple weeks, but earlier this week, when he started fussing after only 30 minutes, I started crying. I moved into the living room and nursed him in the recliner chair and slept with him on my chest. This seems to help me get more rest, but I am concerned that he might get spoiled and want to sleep only when held.

I will post some more later, right now I have a fussy baby with an open mouth waiting for my services. I mostly just wanted to get this written out. If you made it this far, thanks for reading. ;)

My 100th Post.

I've been hesitant to post because this is my 100th post with this blog...I wanted it to be significant. The only events lately around here, I don't really want to talk about....it's depressing. We were supposed to close last wednesday on our house....and we still don't know when exactly we will close.

But like I said before, I don't want to talk about it.

I'm finding that I get excited when my period doesn't start when it should. I'm on the pill, so I'm very regular. Every 4 weeks by 10am, I begin to spot. Sometimes earlier if I've been up for a while. But this last week I didn't really start until Tuesday. All of monday I thought, "what if I'm pregnant?"

Then all of tuesday I was disappointed. Then yesterday I was watching "I didn't know I was Pregnant." A tv show about women who have babies and for the majority (sometimes all) of the pregnancy they don't know they're pregnant. The girl on there this particular episode got pregnant twice and didn't know it! She was 34 weeks with the second child and didn't know she was preggo...

So then I begin believing that it's possible with me. Wishful thinking I guess...

I want a baby, but I know that we are not ready. We will have a mortgage to pay, and without my income, we won't be able to pay our mortgage. So we need to figure a few things out before we have a baby. I want to figure it out soon...

It's someone's birthday today...

Happy Birthday Jess!

Wedding photos are up...

If you're my friend on Facebook, you can check out the rest of my wedding photos. There are so many, I had a hard time picking photos to put on here. I probably put more than I wanted to on here...but oh well!

June 6, 2009: Our 4 year anniversary. We were able to celebrate 4 years together by getting married!

This is a photo from the rehearsal. Dad and I walking down the aisle. (the aisle moved for the actual wedding to limit the amount of mud we had to walk through)

This is simply a photo of the centerpieces with my precious favor boxes. Stay tuned for some up close photos of the favor boxes on my crafty blog!

Jamaal getting his boutonniere on.

My ladies and I.


Our "special moment."


The bride.


My prince in the spotlight.


My groom.

My favorite.

The whole gang.

My ladies.

See our pretty flowers??

What time is it? (I love Connor Bly in this photo, my nephew and one of my ring bearers.)

My family, with the newest addition, my husband!

Our parents.

Mom and dad, I need some space!

"You were supposed to pretend kiss me mom!"

Dad and I being "us." Don't remember what was so funny, but that's okay.

Me and my new family.


I love this photo of Jamaal and his brother!!


Connor Bly playing with the Sit-to-Stand. (The chair perfect for elderly and/or people with arthritis; you push a button and it lifts up to make it easier to stand up from sitting.)


For Connor it was a ride.


Our champagne toast, my last as a single woman.

Our beautiful, gorgeous, yummy yummy cake! Made by Jamaal's cousin Tashina!


A close up of the top of the cake.


So here is where the ceremony gets interesting. We had two ring bearers. Connor, my nephew, and Sienna, Jamaal's cousin's kid. Apparently Sienna wanted to hold Connor's hand down the aisle, because she wanted to marry him. But Connor did not want to hold her hand, nor did he want to get married.

Sienna was very upset. Her heart was broken, and here she is crying/pouting down the aisle. She later said that she didn't want to marry him anymore, and that she didn't like him anymore.

Once I left the comfort of the Senior Center, I started to cry. I was trying very hard to not cry....but that effort was futile.

During our very very short ceremony.


First kiss as husband and wife.


Getting food! I was so very hungry.


Connor acting as professional photographer. He probably took 20 pictures of me and Jamaal eating.

The rings.

My Gonzaga group (the ones able to make it).

My nursing school crew.

First dance as husband and wife.


Cutting the cake.

We were nice to each other.


Speeches. Bret said he wouldn't make me cry, which was a lie. (It's very easy to make me cry...)

Kristina's speech.

Dancing with my father. He is a big baby too. From the very start he was crying.

Jamaal and his mom.

You ready for this??

She dropped it, but was the one that caught it.

Careful now!

My girls from high school.

Being silly.

Signing the marriage license.

I just like this picture.

I think she's a little young for a drink, don't you?

High school buds.

Our ride

"Are you serious?" I could not believe our ride was so big!!

Good night kiss. I feel so over dressed!